Recognising Coercive Control and Its Impact on Women

In recent years, awareness of coercive control has grown, yet many still struggle to identify its insidious presence in their lives or workplaces. The statistics are sobering. In England and Wales (excluding Devon and Cornwall), police recorded 43,774 incidents of coercive control in the year ending March 2023. This represents a steady increase from 41,626 cases in 2022 and 33,954 in 2021 (ONS, 2023a).

While coercive control is often discussed in the context of intimate relationships, its effects can ripple into every aspect of a victim’s life, including their career and business. The psychological impact of coercive control often mirrors post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), leaving victims grappling with confusion, isolation, helplessness, exhaustion, and entrapment.

What is Coercive Control?

Coercive control is a pattern of behaviour used to dominate and degrade. Unlike physical abuse, which may leave visible marks, coercive control works invisibly—eroding self-esteem, independence, and a sense of safety. The behaviours can include:
• Isolation from friends, family, and support networks.
• Monitoring or controlling communication and finances.
• Using threats, humiliation, or manipulation to instil fear.
• Depriving victims of basic freedoms or autonomy.

The overwhelming majority of perpetrators are men, with 97.7% of convictions in 2023 involving male offenders (ONS, 2023b). Although men can be victims too, studies consistently show that women are disproportionately affected, particularly in cases involving intimate partner violence.

The Emotional Toll: Parallels to PTSD

Coercive control doesn’t just create immediate distress; it leaves victims carrying the psychological scars long after the abuse has ended. Here are some of the common emotional experiences victims face and how they parallel PTSD:

Confusion: Unsure if you’re overreacting or imagining the abuse

Gaslighting—a hallmark of coercive control—leaves victims questioning their reality. You might find yourself replaying conversations or events, wondering if you’ve misunderstood or overreacted. This mirrors the intrusive thoughts often experienced by those with PTSD, where a fog of self-doubt and confusion clouds judgment and erodes confidence.

Isolation: Cut off from friends, family, and support networks

Isolation is one of the most effective tools of coercive control. By severing connections with loved ones, abusers make it harder for victims to seek help or gain perspective. This mirrors the social withdrawal seen in PTSD, where feelings of shame or fear prevent individuals from maintaining relationships. Over time, the lack of external validation deepens despair, leaving victims feeling unseen and unheard.

Helplessness: Feeling like nothing you do is ever enough

Victims often describe a sense of futility—no matter how hard they try, the abuser’s demands keep shifting. This relentless criticism and moving of goalposts create a dynamic of learned helplessness, similar to what’s observed in PTSD. Over time, this sense of powerlessness drains motivation, leaving victims feeling stuck and unable to escape the cycle.

Exhaustion: Drained from constantly managing their emotions

Living under coercive control often means walking on eggshells, hyper-vigilant to the abuser’s moods or behaviours to avoid conflict. This parallels the hyper-arousal state in PTSD, where individuals are perpetually on edge, scanning for potential threats. The constant emotional labour of trying to maintain peace can leave victims feeling utterly depleted.

Trapped: Feeling there’s no way out without making things worse

Fear of retaliation, financial dependency, or emotional blackmail often keeps victims trapped. This sense of entrapment mirrors the immobilisation seen in PTSD, where individuals feel paralysed by fear and hopelessness. Even when a way out exists, the perceived risks of leaving can feel insurmountable.

Recognising the Signs

It’s crucial to understand that coercive control isn’t always obvious. Abusers often mask their behaviour as care or concern—such as checking your phone “to keep you safe” or discouraging friendships “because they don’t have your best interests at heart.” These behaviours can escalate subtly over time, making it harder to pinpoint when the line was crossed.

For women in business, the impact can extend beyond personal relationships. Coercive control can undermine your confidence, affect decision-making, and leave you second-guessing yourself in professional settings. Recognising the signs and seeking support is the first step toward reclaiming your power.

Finding Support

If you or someone you know is experiencing coercive control, it’s important to seek help. Organisations like Women’s Aid and Refuge offer confidential support and resources. Legal protections are also improving; coercive control is recognised as a criminal offence in the UK, and increasing numbers of perpetrators are being held accountable.

Coercive control isn’t just about power—it’s about stripping away autonomy, confidence, and dignity. But with the right support, recovery is possible. Recognising the patterns and reaching out for help can set you on the path to regaining your independence and thriving, both personally and professionally.
Coercive control is a silent epidemic affecting thousands of women each year. By shedding light on its signs and impacts, we can empower victims to break free and build lives of strength, resilience, and hope.