Email to a FriendWe recently held a Brilliant Breakfast event in support of the amazing Prince’s Trust ‘Change a Young Woman's Life’ campaign.
We hosted over 50 women on zoom for some uplifting networking and a self-care workshop presented by Prince’s Trust alumni Kimberley Drain of Nourish Northern Mamas.
During the networking session, we asked everyone to talk about the advice they would give to their younger selves. Encouraging them to look back and consider the support they would have benefited from as young women.
What Would You Tell Her?
There were some brilliant answers. Many women shared their stories and pearls of wisdom and we want to share them here with you.
First up is our co-owner, entrepreneurial marketer & business leader Helen Fletcher.
Helen says…
- 1. Be around people who believe in you.
- 2. Tell people you believe in them.
Because, when I look back, I can see it’s the people that believed in me that really helped me achieve what I wanted to achieve.
Recently, my dad had been having a clearout and gave me my old school reports. There was one teacher who stood out – Mrs Owen, my maths teacher clearly believed in me. I remember Mrs Owen giving up her coffee breaks in the staff room to coach me in maths because I had some big gaps because I’d been to 6 different primary schools (my dad was in the RAF). I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I went on to do a maths degree.
Later, when I was in my late 20s, I worked for someone who I can now see, set me up for failure and this basically crushed my self-confidence. To cut a long story short, I left the company with my confidence at the lowest it’s been having been told that I wouldn’t progress anytime soon.
The power of belief
Thankfully, when I changed companies, I ended up working for this phenomenal woman, called Emma, who believed in me and recognised that I was having a crisis of confidence. She turned things around for me by asking lots of people who I worked with to send her 3 or 4 words they would use to describe me, and then she got me in a room and read them all to me.
So, she basically spent an hour telling me how brilliant people in my organisation thought I was. I went on to be promoted twice in 2 years at the new company and I honestly don’t think it would have happened if Emma hadn’t believed in me.
And the last story I’m going to tell about belief is about a young woman I worked with 5 years ago. Together we had set up a large children’s day nursery – me with no experience of setting up nurseries and her with some. It was overwhelming at times and we had some major ups and downs together, but we did it and made a success of it. And when I sold the nursery, she sent me a card that said: ‘thank you for believing in me, when I didn’t believe in myself’.
So, my advice to my younger self would be:
Ellen Badat of Purple Tree Solutions
Ellen’s advice to her younger self is…
Look after your health – it’s the only thing you’ve really got.
This also means that you should protect your time and appreciate the power of saying NO. Ellen also had a brilliant tip to do this - DND days!
This stands for Do Not Disturb/Do Nothing Day. To make sure these happen write the word ‘something’ in your diary. When somebody asks if you’re free you can say “I’ve got something in my diary I cant make it”.
Our Kent franchisee Katherine Vass’ advice is:
Number 1 - Put yourself out there and meet new people.Do things that stretch your comfort zone, it will give you extra capacity and you will grow. It is never as scary as your mind will lead you believe!
Number 2 - Make daily exercise part of your routine, it will keep you level headed and give you more confidence.Cumbria based Jo Geddes came along to our Brilliant Breakfast and shared the advice she would give to her younger self.
Don’t let other people's opinions change your mind about your dreams and ambitions.There is a well-known saying. “The opinions of others is not your business”. Don't be too concerned with what other people think. Don't doubt yourself and think… “I wouldn’t be good at that or I can’t do that.”
Live a life of adventure, not of regret.Chester member Sally Inkster shared her advice for her younger self.
“You have the right to do whatever you want to!”
Sally explained that a thought she often had when she was younger was… What gives you the right to?
What gives you the right to this success, or ambition, or countless other things?
This was a feeling that Sally had as a result of feeling ‘squashed’ by others – and the resulting need to minimise herself. But on reflection Sally would tell her younger self that she has the right to do and achieve anything she pleases. Don’t become less to make others feel better.
“Be yourself!”
Bedfordshire & West Hertfordshire franchisee Louise Yexley has some great advice she would give to her younger self.
“Always say yes to opportunities as you never know where they might lead you in life.”Marylebone member Margaux Cras’ advice rings true with many of us.
“Take care of yourself – if you don’t take care of yourself then nothing works.”When Margaux first arrived in the UK she was working 7 days a week. It wasn’t easy and wanted to give my best everyday but soon found that you can’t put from an empty cup.
If don’t take care of yourself your physical health suffers and you don’t have enough energy and make bad decisions.North Cheshire, East Merseyside & Altrincham franchisee Susie Sprigg’s advice is…
“Learn as much as you can - especially about people”After a significant event in her life, Susie put her energy and focus into learning and self-development, and the results were amazing.
She wishes she had done this much sooner and often thinks about how her life would have changed if she had done this 10 or 20 years ago.Chelmsford member Caroline Sidney-Payne advises…
“Believe in yourself and don't worry too much.”Caroline says - when I first started my business I was going too fast and worrying too much, grabbing at every opportunity and worried to take a break.
But I have learnt not to beat myself up for taking time out or not succeeding at everything I do.
"Don’t worry so much. Believe in the magic of yourself."Finally we heard from Thames Valley franchisee Vicki Messenger.
Vicki says - You don't have to know now what you'll be forever.
“There is so much joy to be found in new chapters.”
Never forget who you are now as you'll be working hard to find her as you get older, and above all - be kind to yourself.